Let me tell you about the candidates that I am choosing from. Don't you just love how I call them candidates? I feel like I'm creating my own lil Flavor Flave or I Love New York Show! I do feel like I can choose, since so many are tryin to holla at the kid! This is an interesting mix, and I am surprised that it has come down to these!
- Caller number 1! He is 37 years old and mixed. Slim and 5'9". Sexy motha fucker! He lives with family and is only available during the morning and late at night! I can work with that. He's a vers bottom that has been aching to suck my dick and let me fuck him for 2 months or longer! This guy is local too! I haven't dismissed this guy only because he wants my dick so badly and he is local.
- Caller number 2! Sexy, in his own way. Independent and has his own place and car. I've sexed with him once and I can't get him out of my mind! This is the dude that I was talking about in my last post! He's cool with me havin a boyfriend, and has actually met him on one occasion. We click. He's 30 and stands at 5'9". He is a bigger man though, in more ways than one! he got a thick 9.5 piece! I still like him though! Not that far away from me, maybe 20 mins... We have met up again. I wanted it to happen. The first time drew me back for more. We are into each other. His Dick, it did things and went places! I have one complaint. He is more of a sex jumpoff than a friend with benefits. There's that friend aspect to it, but it is mostly about sex.
- Caller number 3! This guy is 38 and I have never seen his face pic. He promises that he looks good up and down but will not take a face pic. He has good talk. That is the only reason why he is in the running! lol Dismissed
- Caller number 4! He's 27 years old and 5'10". Slim and toned build, and brown skinned. This guy can suck a mean mutha fuckin dick! He can eat a good ass out! He turned me the hell on just with his mouth! He has this nice shaped dick that, when positioned correctly, can go all the way down your throat! Its about 9 inches long and thick! I love it! He has some good ass too! DAMN! He has a boyfriend, no biggie! He's never home and always at work! He is sexy, but he is from some island. I can't understand much without asking to repeat! We haven't talked since this post was scripted. I'm not quite ready to dismiss him, but if a bitch don't call, dueces!
- Caller number 5! He's like 25 at like 5'9" and has about a 7.5 inch dick! He is one of my friends friends. That is too close to my boyfriend and his friends. I love his dick though. He's a top! sigh... His dick is Dayum Good, but he is a top! I think I will at least consider it! I wanted a vers dude! I called this dude up for a convo. we were chattin. Its been months since we have had a in depth convo. Usually its a text exchange. the usual "whats good" or "how you doin" type of texts. I find out he has a boyfriend. I really don't wanna mess that up for him. I wanna send him a whats good sexy right now, but I don't think I will. I have to dismiss him! :-(
- Caller number 6! This is a group rate! Him and his boyfriend want me to either of themselves or with them both! Both are sexy as hell, both are dl thug type, and live together. They are vers, which is a plus. One is 8 and the other is 9.5 both cut! I think I might shoot there after work today! They been trying to get me to pop thru for a while now! Well, I never got over there. The water remains untested. Maybe today I will see wassup. He's not that far from my job I realized. Maybe on lunch break today? :-)
- Caller number 7! This guy is special! I love his dick and what he can do with it and make my insides feel! He wants me over so I can fuck him and he is only available a few days during the week. Thats ok. He lives in Passaic! That's a drive that I don't wanna make in my gas guzzler more than once a week! He is Puerto Rican, 30 y/o, 5'11", and sexy! He pleases me as the bottom and I wanna see whats going to happen when I see him bottom! I get the feeling that he is playing games with me. We would make a date and I would cancel all other possible dates to go see him. Then all of a sudden phone trouble. He goes offline. I'm not one for taking many hints. Just tell me whats good and I'm gone. You don't have to lie! We'll see how this unfolds. He is still in the running.
- Caller number 8! He is 50, white, positive, and a freak. 10 minutes from my house he is very accessible, but he likes raw sex. I don't know if I can get past that. I have tried so hard to protect myself, I don't wanna do anything to worsen my case! Oh and his cum taste funny! ewww! Dismissed! I can't get over the idea that he is positive AND wants raw sex! Whether he's undetectable or not!
- Caller Number 9! He is also up in age, but I think he isn't quite at 50 yet, lol! He's Jamaican and tall as fuck! He's 6'6" and towers me in every sense of the word! We have been communicating since like 2004. We have only met once, and it was recently during my lunch break. He drove 2 hours from upstate New York to see me! He is sexy for his age, and can make me laugh and smile. Down sides, he is married, and lives in upstate New York. He is a top! However he has money and is willing to come to see me whenever! Oh another down side, there is a emotional connection forming! I did not want that to happen! This might be another post real soon! He picked me up from my job one day. (My car was in the shop) We went over his place and chilled. There is way too much emotions going on in this guys head for me. "I love you", "you're beautiful inside and out", "You're mine now"!!! Absolutely not. At the very least we will have a casual friendship. He is dismissed!
- Caller Number 10! He's 21 and bangin as all hell! He is a pretty boy in all senses of the word. He is a big dick vers bottom. 10 inches cut with a fat ass! He is this type of ghetto gangsta type of mentality. He is positive. We exchanged phone numbers and I believe that I could help him out a bit with dealing with it. He is depressed sometimes and struggles with it. The only bad thing about it is that he is gangsta as hell! He been in jail! lol I don't want him to pull a oozy out on me and shit! Anyway, we phone boned and that was cool. IDK what to do with this one at all!
I was going to post pictures, but you know how everybody knows everybody! I ain't trying to here that I done slept wit ya friend/lover/fuck buddy! lol Plus I don't know if they read or have blogs as well. Its a small world! Maybe I will take their faces out and show you their bodies or dick shots!
20 comments:
LoL this is funny. Ok, I have issues with a couple. Here goes (hehe):
CN 1: Ummmmmmm you're 37 and live with your family? Does family mean 'mother/father'? If so they better be sick cause that's a turn off. NEXT!
CN 2: Sounds good but bigger as in 'stocky'? Slim boyz for me. And how did he meet your dude? Now that's a post in and of itself! LoL.
CN 3: NEXT!
CN 4: Well ya'll both have dudes but umm... iono. Sounds good outside of that. I'd NEXT tho. No Drama
CN 5: Emergency Dick in a glass!
CN 6: I actually think I know who these katz are. I'll email you! LoL
CN 7: I know who this is too. NEXT!
CN 8: NEXT!
CN 9: Married...? NEXT!
Just my opinion baby boy. Good luck lol.
~Damnit!
hey yah thats a good idea.. post your pic. wahahahahahahhahahaha
No return no calls, the canidates are not right! Residing at home with his parents, some got boy friends, others are just dick! My brotha you have got to find what it is you really want...
Please excuse the type o's I am keyboarding while my Boo is performing his wifey duties. The type o was suppose to be candidate. Holla!
So many men, so little time.
One important thing, raw sex with another HIV person is a no no. Reinfection is not cool. Too many different strands of HIV and a limited amounts of medications.
ALL I'm going to say about this post is OH MY!!! lol
Rock on playa lol
Caller #2 has my vote!
Just curious...do you EVER divulge your HIV status to your suitors or sexors? I haven't gone to your dating profile, but I believe there is a law that requires you reveal your status to all of your potential sex partners or risk doing jail time and face civil litigation.
It seems like you believe you are having a grand time...perhaps you are torn internally because you know you should ALWAYS wear a condom...your promiscuous behavior is not helping to stop the spread of HIV/AIDS in the gay community (and I am pretty sure the GMHC would concur since I have done quite a bit of volunteer work with that organization)...there are plenty of straight folks who behave as irresponsibly as you do, so this is not a matter of my being judgemental. Bag it up and tell the truth about your status.
Its all fun and games until someone is 90 lbs soaken wet covered in sores and unable to breathe or move because of the pain that comes with full blown AIDS.
I cannot help but to think that maybe you really WANT full blown AIDS because you might unconsciously believe you deserve AIDS. No one deserves AIDS, but some people actively pursue it and they eventually get what they want.
Whatever the case may be, in the spirit of Pride week, I believe you should start thinking of love of self. LOVE YOURSELF. SLOW DOWN. Don't you value yourself enough to be selective in giving away your body? Or has contracting the virus just made you feel such a deep rooted sense of self loathing that you could care less about WHO you really are? I dont mean externally...I mean internally. Who are you really?
I have read a lot of your postings and I am not amused by your antics. I am deeply saddened that you would spread yourself and the HIV virus around so recklessly. Its not funny, its quite tragic. Tragedy is not an excuse for recklessness...
Please get some help.
Resting in silence and biting my tongue!
Signs of patience and poise @ Ailed.
@Caspar608 - In your liesure I implore you to peruse Ailed's previous post and the subsequent comments that were made to the post. Perhaps your interpretation and opinions in response his post will change.
~Damnit!
Ailed, this is not the time for you to sit in silence and bite your tongue. When you post blogs such as this for everybody to see, you have to be prepared for ALL feedback, whether you feel it's good or bad. You have to stand up and defend yourself when people come at you like that.
"come at him" like what? Truthfully, with concern...? : /
Here's the thing, ALK posted his life for ALL to see. If he didnt want to subject himself to the observations of others, perhaps he should have blocked his blog and spared himself any discomfort he may have caused himself when a MOTHER reads his posts and worries about the consequences of unprotected sex. I believe the Captain has actually insulted you on a few occassions...as he insulted someone very near and dear to me...
So, "Jersey Brotha" do tell what makes YOU feel ALK should have to defend himself against my saying he should LOVE himself enough to not spread himself around so much?
I have two sons, brotha, and I tell them the same thing. Its up to them to listen. Its not cute for any person regardless of race creed or orientation to behave promiscuously ... its sad, but that is just MY opinion.
Perhaps I read some of his postings incorrectly, but I could have sworn ALK said he was HIV positive...that, too, is unfortunate. I lost two uncles to AIDS within 5 years of each other. One was a heroin addict...the other led a promiscuous lifestyle despite the fact he had a loyal, loving partner for over 25 years. The manner in which they dies, the condition their bodies were in is something I will never forget...the images are seered into my memory.
If this particular blog is ALL in jest, well, at least you know everything I said came from the same place your own Mother would reach from if she wanted to talk to you about loving yourself, loving your body.
Peace.
@ Caspar608: I am not going to even say what Ailed does is correct. Not going to try to justify what he does either! If you would of just noticed what he is trying to do and how he feels from the last post and this post you will see there is a change.
Fuzzy:
Thank you for your clarification...said with class and dignity.
ALK:
Bitch? Hahahaha...
coming for me by calling me a "bitch" is rather laughable considering your half ASSed attempt at insulting me is from the same mind that would allow another dude to call your ASS a PUSSY. It was inevitable that you would be so defensive.
Understand this, while my comments are said purely out of concern for you, your health and well being and the health and well being of the community at large, it is glaringly obvious that my good intentions were wasted on someone who seems to desire nothing more than to have his ASShole used and abused run through and tread upon more than I-95 Monday through Friday. Vers or not. Top, bottom and in between. If you were a WOMAN with a PUSSY I would say the same thing to you. Unfortunately, in this day and age...telling someone to LOVE themselves by RESPECTING themselves is like speaking Mandarin. Bobby Brown had his prerogative too, and look at the HOT MESS he is today...
Perhaps I did not read all of your posts - which might have given me more insight on your "evolution" as a man. I simply clicked on your name after reading your post on a friends blog and went backward from your most recent posting. If you have made progress, congratulations.
So, rather than waste my time visiting your blog and read about how you disrespect yourself (and your partner) while some sit back and laugh, others say nothing at all or push you towards destruction, I am going to spend my time visiting blogs where folks are clearly not in the early stages of dementia, lashing out at anyone in the general public who offers an opinion. By the way, demetia comes with the territory you are walking on right now bro.
God bless you. take. your. meds. and wrap. it. up.
P.S. being "harsh" for whatever reason you feel may have brought you satisfaction would not have affected me in the least bit. I love who I am and you, little AILED knight are not my type ; )
*Sigh...* (This is going soooo left field.)
The best of intensions be they noble may not be relevant if proper research is not done to ascertain whether a comment is warrented. From this blogs inception many of us have offered critiques and criticisms of his actions both on and in some occassions off of blogger.
My contention is not with the 'quality' of your (Caspar608)comments, but the 'quantity' of your research. Due diligence would have lead you to the conclusion that many of your 'motherly' and valid concerns were previously shared with Ailed in previous post which by in large were far more risqué than this one.
Further, I would hope as adults we could agree that no matter the comments and/or opinions left on our pages, this is a forum to engage each other in ideas, 'civily'.
Peace & Blessings
~Damnit!
I agree with you on that DAMMIT.
Wow wat a post huh? lol
LOL @ number 10. Ummm.... sure that ain't my cousin? lol.
After reading the entire blog, and reading Caspar608's comments I have to agree with both sides of the arguement.
The blogger's overly promiscuous attitude towards sex as recreation has serious consequences to others, especially when he does not announce his status to his partners. it is against the law.
He is also putting himself at rish by using this site, because if one of his suitors does end up with HIV, and does find this blog, it can be used in court to show his reckless behavior which could lead to serious jail time.
I understood in his blog that he felt "guilty" for what he had done. When I was five, I felt guilty for stealing some candy....but the difference is he put people's lives at risk!
And now on his blog he has ten people he is trying to pick from to get his kicks from. How does he measure them? Well by their dick, or the sexual gratificatgion he could get...
No where does he mention personality, love or sincere care for another...he lines up his conquests and decide which one he is going to use for a while...thats sick! Candidates?????give me a break! In a couple of months you will be off to the next person.
You have to be honest with yourself. You may be changed, you may be doing what you need to to protect others NOW, but how about those in the past? have you told thme your status yet? Dont you need to make sure you just did not ruin their lives?
46% of african american men who have sex with other men are infected. It is because of the carelessness shared in your own blog that this has happened.
You may be changed....but go back and read most of your blog...all it details is who you met, where you had sex, and whos next on your list.
To even have a blog to detail your sex life is preverted, sick with no respect to your previous partners, whether or not you hide their names. If someone is intentive enough, they will figure out you are writing about them.
However, it is your right to have this blog...and if some people are actually entertained by it, then so be it.
I am just worried for you, because not only the major risks you continue to take, but the fact you keep a detailed written account of what happened. If anything ever came up in court, this website would be used to show your past carelessness...this website has the ability to put you behind bars for a while!
I suggest if you continue to write about your exploits, to at least tell people how safe your were...or better yet not share that type of information in the first place. You are digging a whole that you just may fall into.
Like it’s always said, there are two sides to every story. I’ve been reading this blog from the very beginning, and what keeps me coming back to it, is the fact that I believe the author is trying to grow as a person.
I believe he started this blog off for the same reasons as some of us, to simply “let it out.” It was evident from his very first entry that he was creating this blog to express himself. On his very first entry he said “ I wish to simply vent the things that would cause me more hurt if I told the people I know. It would most definitely result in pain, hurt, anger, rage, bitterness and resentment. All of that is in me and needs to be released!”
Now with that said I can understand where Caspar608 and Tyson are coming from. I myself have cringed when I have read that you’ve had unprotected sex, with someone who didn’t know your status. I’ve wondered if you felt any remorse for the lives that you have ruined with your sometimes reckless acts. I’ve followed your blog wondering how your illness affects you physically, emotionally, and mentally. From this blog…and these entries, it doesn’t appear so.
But I know, that this just couldn’t be the case. You just have chosen not to divulge that side of yourself to us. And that’s very well within your rights. What I think everyone who reads your blog needs to understand, is that we’re only seeing a snap shot into your life. We have no idea what happens with you in-between entries or candidates.
However I will say this to you Ailed LittleKnight, I do believe that you lead a very reckless and obscure life. I worry for you, and in between entries, I get nervous thinking that something may have happened to you. Your safety, and your health should be your number 1 priority, but your entries don’t prove this to be so. I do think you started this blog for good reasons, but maybe somewhere along the line you got distracted, and your exploits became your main focus.
Either way, you asked for “…comments, criticism, concern, and remarks. I want feedback. I know what I am, somebody else is. I know what I hurt someone else has hurt. I don't want sympathy I want empathy!”
Please keep that in mind, when your readers extend opinions, questions, and concern to you.
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